Humour (douance.be)

[jsf]

"Heureux soient les fêlés, car ils laisseront passer la lumière ..." Michel Audiard
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"Les humoristes sont plus utiles que les philosophes ... A moins que ce ne soient eux les vrais philosophes. " Jean Yanne
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"Il faut se méfier des comiques, parce que quelquefois ils disent des choses pour plaisanter ..." Coluche
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Pour ceux qui lisent l'anglais : Institute for the Study of the Neurologically Typical (ISNT) , site parodique qui "étudie" les neuro-typiques (NT : les gens "normaux" donc) comme un trouble du comportement ... ("isnt" = "is not")

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Page officielle de défense et illustration de la langue xyloglotte
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frites.be : Le rendez-vous des piqués de la toile belgo-belge!          
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Janclod (not' Vandamme)       Citations
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Consultations : Le docteur Yao reçoit de 7h à  18h30, même les jours fériés.
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45toursnazes, l'almanach des chansons les plus nazes jamais sorties! (de 1960 à  2003)
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Si vous avez cinq minutes (ça ne prendra pas plus) :
fautvraimentetreconpouravoiruneadresseinternetaussilongue.com
poubelle.net
perdu.com
Si vous avez un peu plus de temps : waitallday.com
Et si vous avez de bons yeux (ou une loupe sous la main) : guimp.com
Et si vous êtes surdoué et con (c'est pas si rare ...) : tasdecons.com
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Le dico des smileys ou émoticons
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Hearing so many people speaking ill about his intelligence level, George W. Bush decided to get his brain checked. The physician's diagnosis was:
'Mr. President, you have two brains, the left and the right, like all normal people. But the problem is: in your left brain, there is nothing right and in your right brain, there is nothing left !      
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Les citations rassemblées par Tom Goldschmidt
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Dilbert       True Tales of Induhviduals
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Lizard's Gifted Adult World

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MBTI (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator)
ISTJ I Save Things Judiciously, I Suit Tax Jobs
ISTP I See The Problem
ESTP Everyone Seems Too Proper, Extraordinarily Smooth Talking Person
ESTJ Execution Saves The Job, Everyone Seems Too Juvenile
ISFJ I Serve Family Joyfully
ISFP I Seek Fun & Pleasure, I Secretly Feel Pastoral
ESFP Entertaining Sparkly Friendly Person,  
ESFJ Extra Special Friendly Joiner, Earthly Service Feels Just
INFJ Inner Nuances Foster Journeys, Imagination Never Feels Juvenile
INFP I Never Find Perfection, I Need Feeling People, Inner Nuances Fuel Possibilities
ENFP Everyday, New Fantastic Possibilites,  
ENFJ Everyone Needs Fulfillment & Joy
INTJ It's Not Thoroughly Justified
INTP It's Not Theoretically Possible, I Need To Plan
ENTP Every New Thought Propels
ENTJ Executives Need Tough Jobs


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Des étudiants en médecine reçoivent leur premier cours d'anatomie avec un vrai corps humain. Ils sont tous réunis autour d'une table d'opération avec le corps recouvert d'un drap blanc.
Le professeur leur dit :

- "En médecine, il faut avoir 2 qualités importantes. La première, il ne faut pas être dégoûté". Là  dessus, le prof retire le drap, enfonce un doigt dans l'anus du mort et, quand il l'a retiré, il suce son doigt.

- "Allez, faites la même chose que moi". Les étudiants, après quelques minutes d'hésitation, passent chacun leur tour. Ils enfoncent le doigt dans l'anus du mort et sucent leur doigt après l'avoir retiré. Quand tout le monde a fini, le prof les regarde et leur dit :

- La seconde qualité, c'est l'observation. J'ai enfoncé mon majeur et j'ai sucé l'index...


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How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.

[guismo]

ah ! c'est que ca commencait a nous manquer un  jsf :mrgreen:

[jsf]

encore que si vous allez sur la rubrique humour de douance.be, il y a plein de choses sympas.
[website]http://www.douance.be[/website]